I think I’ll try defining gravity
THIS IS THE PUN OF ALL PUNS EVERYBODY CAN GO HOME NOW
(via surprisebitch)
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Hey is the build a bear employee supposed to force us to jump up and down or are we getting hazed
as a build-a-bear employee it is my honor to happily inform you that we get to make everyone do whatever the fuck we want during a heart ceremony. jump to get that heart beating. rub that heart to your knees so your furry friend always needs you. rub it to your toes so it’s totally awesome! shake it up so it’s got enough energy to hang out with you all day! close your eyes, make a wish, and give it a kiss you helpless motherfucker
(via goosegoblin)
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Prompt-based fandom events are when you really learn everyone’s colors like you’ll find the people who take the prompt “death” and come up with some smarmy ship-art of character A and character B walking over dead leaves while wearing scarves and drinking hot cider and then you’ll find the people who take the prompt “sunshine” and write how a bright glint of sunshine reflected off the barrel of a gun is the absolute last thing character A sees before taking a bullet to the chest
you can lead a content creator to water but you sure as fuck can’t make him drink
content creators, much like the elder gods, must not be given requests that can be left to interpretation, for the results bring madness upon the unwary
(via yawpkatsi)
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okay i just had a bad epiphany but corporate interest’s influence on the internet is going to become so much stronger now that generations that are internet naturalized have grown up and starting working as “social media consultants”. advertising is going to become so much more subtle, manipulate your behavior to a greater extent, and completely pervade every aspect of our lives the more we rely on the internet for everything from entertainment to social validation.
what im saying is its scary that corporate twitter accounts are getting good at twitter. to have the same avenue a human would to express themself. its like, an extreme anthromorphism of a brand, and that brand representing a corporate interest, and successfully passing itself off as a sentient entity on twitter, thats really weird to me.
like this is so fucked up. it doesnt immediately read as an advertisement, conceptually it executes the levels of irony and deconstruction that usually make for successful memes in this genre or whatever. its almost subverting itself, but ultimately it still succeeds as an advertisement. it makes me sick. for every misfire of corporations trying to relate (pepsi protest commercial), theres another company getting better at it
okay but like my thing about this is… who is actually eating at these places because shit like this? yeah it’s funny but i never go to wendy’s because a meme, if i go to wendy’s it’s because i want a gross burger and a frosty, same with taco bell and mcdonald’s and wherever the fuck.
i really think that you’re blowing this out of proportion and having very little faith in people’s ability to decide what they want for themselves. it’s just not that deep.
It’s not about the effectiveness of the ads in question, but their complete omnipresence in every aspect and moment of life, and how bizarre and sophisticated the mechanations of advertising have become. If people don’t call attention to these things, they become normal.
The effectiveness of marketing isnt one-to-one, like, “ad says burger is good, I think burger is good, I eat burger.” That was 50 years ago. Y'all, since then these multi-million dollar corporations have been hiring psychologists and sociologists and anthropologists to study how best to get under consumer skin and theyve figured out it’s not about making you WANT a burger,
It’s about creating a Brand Identity - an anthropomorphized personality that your brain fits into an established schema (system of thought) so it’s easier to just drop into the background of your everyday life. It’s not about making you want a burger, it’s about making it so, when you DO want a burger, the first place you think of is Wendy’s, because their ads have made you think about them five time already that day. And most importantly, it’s about making sure you dont realize how often they make you think about them, so you don’t resent how pervasive they’ve become. They do that by tricking your brain into thinking of them as just another human-like personality. Your Funny Meme Friend Wendy’s. Wine Aunt World Market. Woke Jock Nike. Even your Endearingly Unhip Uncle Geico.
(hey also if you want dozens of terrifying examples of what I mean, just type ‘brand identity schema’ into Google like I just did and take a gander at all those scholarly articles discussing how best to acquire consumers, like we’re a fucking commodity)
one time i said i didn’t like the wendys twitter and got called classist for hating retail employees
this shit works. it makes people like Brands. gets under their skin and in to their minds. when i said i didnt like the wendys twitter i personally offended people that viewed wendys as a friend, that viewed the wendys social media manager as a friendly individual that they respected.
the wendys social media manager is not your friend. they don’t even really exist. there’s no one person that writes the tweets for wendys. there’s a team of 20 something year olds that casually observe the latest meme trends and crank out mspaint memes because they know they’ll get retweeted if the memes are relevant.
they trick you in to thinking that Wendys is a hip friendly young person, and they manipulate you in to thinking that disliking marketing is somehow a “problematic” “un-woke” thing to do.
and it works.
install ublock origin. on mobile, block every promoted tweet you see. don’t let them convince you that this shit is normal.
And this isn’t “no fun allowed”. Just be aware of what companies want from you and realise that brand loyalty shouldn’t be a thing… They will not be loyal to you in return.
Steak-ummm is the leader of this:
It’s making tons of people fans of the brand, because they feel like the brand is a friend.
#yes#some of that advertising works like a virus#like i don’t remember which latest brand was ~stolen by the reylo fandom wasn’t it wendy’s?#let’s say it was#it’d be truer to say wendy’s hijacked this section of the fandom for a few days#basically getting people to do the advertising for them#neither wendy’s nor dole nor any other brand that jumped on the bandwagon *ships* reylo#when they mention it it’s not validation#it’s a marketing scheme cibled on a group that craves validation and recognition#there’s nothing friendly about it (via and-then-bam-cassiopiea)
(Source: peer2peer2peer, via chaoticgaydroid)
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Can y’all leave Chris the fuck alone? I seriously cannot imagine being so pressed at something so innocuous. Also someone saying “have a blessed day” makes them a freak? You must be literally the worst person to be around at all times.
various Hollywood goblin men: rape women and children for decades
journalists: my lips are sealed
chris pratt:is somewhat christian
journalists:
(via odinsnotwearingmakeup)
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when i was younger the way i felt about girls kissing was different. it made me uncomfortable, like i knew i shouldn’t hear my own heart skip. i remember watching boys kiss girls on tv and teaching myself “this is all i have”. i’m 24 and i still feel guilty when i think about how much i like girls. i hid it and hated it and i’m not even out to half of my friends. i couldn’t figure out why i felt certain things. i wrecked myself over it, made it hard for me to be in longterm relationships, made it hard to love without feeling like i’m doing the wrong thing.
but yesterday i was teaching a group of second graders.
“i think i want a girlfriend,” she said to me. when a boy squawked “a girlfriend!” the other kids stood up for her instantly. “it’s normal!” “it’s okay if some people want different things.” “yeah, not everybody needs to like boys.”
the boy shook his head and stared at me. “i don’t care it’s a girl” he said, with his hands in the air, “but we don’t even pay taxes, how is she thinking of getting married?”
“miss raquel,” she asked, “why does it look like you’re crying?”
::whispers “we don’t even paytaxes” to self::I had a little girl the other day ask me to draw her a princess… I did and she gleamed and said, “I love her I want to marry her!” Her mother looked over and said, “you two would look adorable together,” and I’m honestly just so happy and it warms my heart how open-minded the next generation of children are. Parents are slaying these days.
(Source: inkskinned, via oregaymi)
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my mom almost named me Andrea pronounced like an-dray-ah but she was premptively annoyed at her family members pronouncing it an-dree-ah so she last second named me Rebecca. lmao. jokes on her tho i woulda gone by Andy if that was my name & i go by Bec in this timeline. you can name the tomboy after a fucking flower and she’ll squeeze an androgynous nickname out of it
“i’m going to name my daughter…………Rosemary Heather Smith :)”
(daughter 13 years later in cargo shorts and a WWE shirt) “sup i’m Heath”
(via oregaymi)
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(via tigerleli)
The balls to try and pull that off with the professor of criminology, though.
You can tell which one’s really from a professor because the fake one has that professional sign off and the real ones end in “Sent from my iPhone”
(Source: tastefullyoffensive, via odinsnotwearingmakeup)
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women writing love songs: i am a wild, untamed, dangerous thing but you are a brave, reckless fool i am a siren luring helpless victims into my depths in my heart there is an unquenchable wildfire and i hope and fear it will consume me
men writing love songs: i love you, alive girl. i will show you with my body, and my lips and my eyes, very soon.
(via oregaymi)
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I murdered a rich guy in Red Dead Redemption 2 who slapped his expensive horse across the face after he lost to me in a race. His horse is now my main horse and she gets all the pats and sugar cubes in the world. I’m feeling good about my cowboy life choises.
Here she is! My beautiful rescue horse that I murdered a man for! I named her Pinky because she has a lovely pink nose.
And of course I braided her mane and tail because she is a queen.
ok well NOW i’ll play video games
(via oregaymi)
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the only DB Cooper theories i accept:
- he died cuz he was an idiot who jumped out of a fucking plane during a rain storm in the middle of the night
- it’s tommy wiseau
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there’s no proof he hit the ground so he could still fall on us at any time
(via tragedymash)
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i heard u guys like carpeted bathrooms so i made a whole post of carpeted bathrooms.
catch me scooting around on the ceiling of the pink one and reaching down to zap people
I’m a fan of the neon moss toilet and the bathroom made entirely of the lumpy yellow chenille blanket that my aunt crocheted before they got the dosage right on her Adderall.
(Source: househunting, via tragedymash)
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Every single one of these headlines sure is something
It’s genuinely the fucking end times
(via tragedymash)
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View high resolution
the curse of the Toy Story generation
someone understands
(via itseasytoremember)
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